Thanks to You, I Get It Now

Dear Social Media Friend,

You know how they say that some arguments don’t make sense in 140 characters or less? Well, today your arguments destroyed me. You blew a hole in my reasoning and drove a tank of wisdom straight through it.

The only thing that tempers my awe is my gratefulness.

The things I was writing—the jokes, the snide asides, the animated GIFs, the conversation with a friend, the rambling thoughts that I posted from my phone as I went to bed in a haze of NyQuil—now I regret them. I made a stupid mistake by typing those with so little consultation.

I never knew you before a few minutes ago, but that’s no excuse; I should have known. So count me a convert. But forgive me—I’m going to be a silent convert. I need a little time to prepare myself before I can fully engage with the kind of thinking that happens in your neck of the social media woods. I hope I’ll catch up one day. Not to you, of course.

Even if you don’t hear from me again, or find it difficult to access my account, be assured: I was the wrong one, and I was grateful. Go home under a banner of victory, for your labor unto my foolishness is hereby finished.


Your Admirer

Written by

CEO,, a digital product studio in NYC. Also writer, Medium advisor, programmer. Any port in a storm, especially ports 80 and 443.

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